Day 391: Tuesday Demonstrates Proficiency in Locking Mechanisms, Locks Myself & Tribal Elder Out of Abode

Every day of my observation of the natives, I am reminded of their constant need for learning – new experiences, proficiency in language and communication skills, dexterity and yes, proficiency with security mechanisms, particularly the type that are capable of creating a barrier between native and elder.  Contemplating the episode now, I have found some humor in the events that caused me and one of the tribal elders to be exiled to the out-of-doors, unable to gain reentry into the tribal elders’ abode, however, previously I did not find the episode funny in the least.  As I have recorded events on numerous prior occasions, I will now describe the situation prior to and after the ordeal.

Today, I journeyed with the natives to the tribal elders’ abode to enjoy a warm afternoon and weekend in their company.  As per usual, our arrival was met with great enthusiasm and the day proceeded normally from there.  Coordinated with our visit with the tribal elders, I scheduled a visit to the dental service professional in the area, utilizing the care of the natives by the tribal elders.  Following that appointment, I returned to the abode and continued my visit with the tribal elders. Tuesday was enjoying herself immensely.  She had, by the time that I returned to the abode, traversed the land of the tribal elders multiple times and had just retreated to the indoors out of the heat of the afternoon sun.  Wednesday was resting in the portable resting quarters that the tribal elders had setup previous to our arrival.   Indeed, business as usual.

The day proceeded further in the normal manner, followed by the bathing ritual, sustenance and preparations for the natives’ slumbers.  Wednesday, who had been exhibiting the nasty, horrible symptoms of teething was the first to retreat to her slumbers, retiring to one of the upper chambers of the abode.  Tuesday, being filled with piss and vinegar, still, ran about the lower level of the abode, apparently unaffected by the activity and energy she expended over the course of the day.  Her listening skills, at this point were rather non-existent as well as her attention span.  We attempted to put a program on the electronic media box to attempt to hold her attention longer, however, the endeavor was only marginally successful.  She soon began to seek other activities involving mischief and shenanigans.  This is where her intentions began to go south.

At this point, I received a call from the tribal leader, who had contacted me to inform me that she was beginning the journey to the tribal elders as well and inquired about a certain pair of foot coverings that were left in the tribe’s mode of transportation.  Unsure of this, I proceeded outside to check in the vehicle.  One of the tribal elders was sitting outside, enjoying the cool evening breeze and the setting of the sun.  I began to look in the vehicle, whilst still conversing with the tribal leader, however, my search came up empty.  The tribal leader decided to turn back and retrieve the shoes in question and I attempted to return to the abode.

What I neglected to notice upon leaving the abode was that Tuesday was right behind me – and more importantly – that she locked the outer, screen door of the abode, with myself and one of the tribal elders.  I was completely and utterly shocked that Tuesday A. knew where the lock to the door was, B. could reach said lock to lock it and C. would actually lock it.  Apparently, I am a dumbass.  Well, she locked the door, maybe she can unlock it as well.

Fat chance, idiot.

Both the tribal elder and myself made repeated attempts to instruct Tuesday how to unlock the door to allow us back in.  To paint the picture further, the other tribal elder was enjoying a bath in the upper level of the abode, unaware of our plight and Wednesday, was now awake and emitting sounds of joy from her resting chambers.  In addition, the telecommunications device began ringing, which we could not answer.  Fan-fucking-tabulous.  Finally giving up on Tuesday and getting her to unlock the door, we began considering other options of regaining access to the abode.  Tuesday continued playing with objects near the door: a chain lock, the handle to the door, the lock to the inside door, etc. and was being of little help to the situation.  Time to call the fucking A-Team.

The tribal elder began attempting to remove the screen to the door, which was beginning to destroy the screen itself.  I, however, had other ideas.  After inquiring about the windows on the lower level of the abode and their status of being locked or unlocked from the outside, I began my attempt to get inside the abode via a window.  Standing on a structure designed to house an outside water hose, I reached the window I had been told was unlocked, which, fortunately was.  Great.  Next, I began carefully removing all of the objects and knickknacks that were on the window sill: a tiny teacup with a koala bear hanging on the edge, another small dish containing keys (none of which to my knowledge opened the door) and a container holding palms from a religious service.  Just as I was about to climb through the window, the other tribal elder appeared in the doorway, inquiring as to what the hell I was doing.  I quickly informed her of our plight and she quickly addressed our situation by unlocking the door.

Tuesday was passing off the episode as if she were surprised to see the tribal elder and I being stuck outside and began insistently requesting a story from the tribal elder. A story?  A story?  Really?  I’ll give you a story about being locked out with no way in except through a window that was eight feet off the ground.  How about a story about a native that gets her bottom paddled for locking people out of the abode.  I’ll give you a story alright.  Anyways, the knickknacks were placed back on the window sill, the screen remained intact and Tuesday soon retired to her slumbers.

As I have stated, I can laugh about this instance now.  I was not pleased during the ordeal, however, I do believe some changes are going to be implemented to avoid this in the future: 1. A key to the door will be placed outside – somewhere. 2. Prior to leaving a native inside, unattended, the native will be strapped to a chair, particularly with ratchet ties, and  3. In the event that numbers 1. and 2. have not been completed, I will be thoroughly instructed as to which windows are unlocked from the outside, not just the ones eight feet off the ground.

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